Friday, April 23, 2010

Melt Down

It seems I only come to this blog now when I am extremely down. I have been doing fairly well recently with more energy and more of a zest for life. Of course, always hurting and missing my Josh, but doing better with dealing with things.

The last two nights I have only slept until 4 am and then 3 am and spent the rest of the night awake. It begins to wear on me after a while and this morning something relatively simple went wrong and I totally lost it. I had a major melt down with screaming (which I never do) and sobbing in a fetal position on the bed. Where did that come from? I don't like that part of me. Now, I am exhausted.............totally spent from all the emotion.

2 comments:

Regina @VestPocketFamilyFarm said...

Some times the spasms of grief are worse because they are farther apart?

Forgive yourself, please. Maybe get counseling?

Maple Lawn Farm said...

Thanks, Regina. I just finished up a group counselling session which I found very helpful. I do have the name of the lady who led our group and she has promised to talk to me should I ever want to talk. I am sure I will sit down with her from time to time just so I have an outlet of sorts to talk things out.