Sunday several of us ended up down at the cemetery after church. So many of us in the same family have lost loved ones in the past year and a half. We didn't plan to meet at the cemetery, it's just that we all had the same thing in mind.
Sunday afternoon, the bird cage arrangement that I had put on Angela's grave on Easter was still there. Monday when Angela's mom went to the cemetery it was gone. Someone must have stole it. I certainly can't understand why someone would steal items left at the grave side for deceased loved ones.
I wanted to take something else to the cemetery but was afraid to take another big bird cage. So, today I took a smaller bird on a nest. I hope no one steals it. Today is six months since Angela passed away. I am struggling today with her death.
I got up this morning and Alissa had left a print out of a conversation that I had with Angela on Face Book. In the conversation I said, "I love you". Angela responded back, "I love you more". When I read that this morning for the first time since she wrote it back in September, I started to cry and could not stop. How I miss my sweet little niece with her beautiful smile and her fun loving ways. It hurst so much to not have her here.
Today is the day Angela died and in two more days it will be the day that Josh died. My heart is heavy.
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I don't know if anyone will find what I am sharing here to be helpful, but I am compelled to share my heart and be completely open. Perhaps it will help me in the healing process and maybe it will even help someone else. This journey will only be complete when I hold Josh in my arms once again.
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